Wednesday, March 17, 2010
The Magic Cup
Last month I was presented with a poetry mug. The mug as the name suggests is nothing ordinary. It was based on the poetry film, Panun Pan Parzun, which eventually won the viewers choice award for all the right reasons. The mug however, will change your life!
Areej Riaz, who was also fortunate enough to attain the mug commented:
" My hair were all fizzy and life-less. I had to straighten , dye or condition them everyday." complained Areej. " But since I started taking coffee in the magic mug, my hair have started growing softer, calmer. If I continue the coffee intake, I am sure very soon I will beat Deepika Pudokonee on hair softness."
Reports are that since these hair growth miracles, Nawaz Shariff is also trying his luck on the mug. He was discovered in Raiwand, Lahore, drinking lassi in the magic cup. He got in a quarrel with his brother Shahbaz Shariff when the latter wanted to share the lassi and consequently the hair growth miracles. This is the first time in 30 years that a quarrel has been reported between the two brothers.
But is the miracle restricted to hair care?
Not at all. Jitendra Ramprakash, the Sadho curator can verify.
" I have a voice perfect for voice-overs, but my singing was pathetic." ( Just pathetic? He almost killed us!)
" But eversince I started drinking in the magic cup, my singing is improving. Not only am I quickly learning when to sing, but also when to stop. And my music teacher was so happy that he allowed me in his house, let me touch his harmonium for five minutes and even offered me Boti Kabab!"
" How did you repay your teacher?!"
The answer was just what we expected!
" I presented him the magic mug!"
On being asked what one should drink in the cup for the optimum results he said anything.
" However I won't suggest you poison yourself with it. Since it emits positive energy, you might wake up behind the bars on charges of "killing yourself" rather then in heavens."
This is not the end. Many girls awaiting a good marriage proposal for many years now have reported to find their "Mr.Right" after close contact with the cup. How exactly these ladies found their way into their beloved's heart is currently inexplainable.
Furthermore, ever wonder how the NFC award got signed? The award regarding the division of resources among the Pakistani provinces has been due since 13 years. Then how did this miracle happen now?
Well the news is that after their personal hair growth miracle, the Shariff Brothers, gave this new recipe to Zardari. Although the latter has no known hair issues, the attempt was to mellow the President a little. Therefore, the Prime Minister fed him special Kashmiri Tea.
My friend Amana went so far as to gift the mug to Lahore's Power Development Authority in hope of reducing electricity shortage. She says an icy drink in the mug makes her immune to the heat, like a cold blooded reptile.
And here is what happened to me. Since last year I had an uncontrollable/painful crush on Obama. But when I happened to go and watch the movie My name is Khan, immediately after having tea in the magic cup, I realized how absurd and sentimental Barrack is .And of course the age difference and his marital status also became more visible. And since then, Obama entered my life's ignore list. He is since then increasing drone attacks to gain my attention but I won't budge. So people! Go and grab this magic mug now and change your life!
This blog is a piece of fiction.
at 3:30 AM